Arrival of Sorpor VIYI! :DDD

Today is a happyyyy day for me, cuz Melbourne has one extra SORPOR already! aka SORPOR YAP VI YI aka ALLYSA YAP (her cover-up bogus name to act civilised =P)!!! AWWWWWWW sobs sobs to finally have a bestie by my side :') so i waited and waited and waited...... till 5pm to get her from the southern cross station.. And when our eyes met.. oh dat sudden gush of feeeling! :') We actually RUSHED towards each other and jumped into a Koala-hugg which is superrrrrr tightttt and squealinggggggggg OMG OMG OMG -- it brought tears, tears of joy :)

Me and the blabber box during Help times.. time really flies~
we werent dat close then, bt i guess friendship grows with time :)

And as usual la.. VIYI and her bigass luggage - im not surprised at all somehow =P just abit of a hassle to carry it on and off the tram so many times cuz i was too ecstatic and actually board the wrong tram! ~.~ paisehhh max. Me and my housemate cooked dinner for her :D yea cuz im just sweet like that =P and went on a leisurely stroll in the city :)

Me and Ms. BlabberBox  somewhere on Swanston :)

Guess what she's doing!!

We came across a.. water fountain? wadya call dat? Hahaha i'll just call it water curtain LOL! near collin's streeet. And we saw people marking their names and  love vows (XXX <3 XXX) on the fountain using dried leaves on the streeet! and of coz.. She went for it. :) i wonder who thought of the idea of using leaves! and i am still thinking how does the leaves stick on there? *scratches head*

Tada! Final product! Hahah in case u cannot read her "high quality" art work.... it spells her name VIYI =P LOL why am i so suay. HAHAHAH like to zat oni.. nights. <3

Funny Attempt to be LADYBOY! :DDDDDD

HAHAHA was skyping with charis dat day and somehow i started doing something funny. LOLS. an attempt to be a "ladyboy" - dat's what lungster regarded it as @__@ ,  and i actually pulled off quite an amazing Mohawk. WAKAKKAKA  lolsss. Here's the product of our stupidity :)

Say HI to CHICKEN LITTLE : D

.... urh.. SAMPAT MAX. I swear i was High or sth.. I swear.. =.="

  Coconut Fringe attempt.. PHAIL. 

OMG.. look like auntie in the pasar HAHHA XD

Idk what is this.. But the pic quality sux.. thx to charis's hi quality webcam :)

And i looked so epic dat i had to take a pic of myself as a mark of stupidity.

HAHAA im so in love with my "cuteness"

     
              I know i look very yong sui.. so signing off nowwwwwww. XOXO.

My Awakening

I have finally woken up now. My awakening. :) - to the amazing and beautiful world that i'm in.


For the first few weeks of swotvac (some coolio term for study week baahaa!), i've been dealing with a ridiculous wave of stress. To make it simple, i've became an EmoKia. :(


I locked myself into study mode, but i didnt realise that i locked myself out from the world. 


My Stress Level : Moderately HIGH 
- Cant sleep cuz haunted by the stacks of notes LOL
- Cant focus cuz thinking of too many WHAT IFS.
- Pessimistic cuz i kept thinking my lecturers are evil and the exams are HELL :/ 
- Fear cuz kept imagining myself BLANKING in the exam hall. boohoo T_T 
- SENSE THE NEGATIVE VIBE GOING ON THERE..??


Basically, i was so stressed that i started to spook myself even tho it's not halloween la BAHA. So freakin stressed out before my Finance paper dat i totally couldnt study and cried over the phone to my parents. Btw CRYING = INSTANT RELIEF. :) that's when i realised.. how much stress i had bottled up in me, and that i was over-stressing myself. It's all over now tho. I learned how to cope. I saved myself just before my last few papers. HOHO.


From this emotional ride, i've learnt : 


1) PROCRASTINATOR + PERFECTIONIST = EPIC FAIl = STRESS BOMB! 


I walked the journey of being a perfectionist in the last minute @_@ YA. im like super left behind in studies cuz im a procrastinator, and yet i am a perfectionist when it comes to grades. not as in must get all A la, it's like, i must know that i've chiong-ed to the max, so no regrets. So proven, PHAIL. 


ACHIEVEMENTS : Loss in appetite, sleep, the ability to focus, got murdered by my Finance paper (BOOHOO MY PROPHECY ABOUT MY EVIL FINANCE LECTURER WAS RIGHT! :X )


Conclusion : PROCASTINATION IS A SIN. AND EXCESSIVE STRESS IS OF NO USE - LAGS YOU BEHIND INSTEAD OF PUSHING YOU FORWARD. Ya u can stress youself till u're constipated but u still wont be able to do the paper, boohoo. so YOU FRIGGIN NEED A POSITIVE AND HEALTHY MIND! :) AND BE REALISTIC. IF PROCRASTINATE MAX, THEN DO NOT EXPECT GOOD RESULTS. REAP WHAT U SOW BABE!


2) DO NOT LOCK POOR SELF INTO FULLSWING STUDY MODE


DANGER ZONE!! I would never make myself do dat again! and neither should anyone else! i am efffing serious to the extent im using the word EFFIN! Hah, lame. @_@ But yea, I locked myselff into a study mode for like one month or 2 weeks or whatever la cant rmb zz. this is obviously a last minute technique la. IT WORKS PERFECTLY IN MALAYSIA BUT IT FAIL LIKE LAOSAI IN AUSTRALIA! In msia, last minute study of one week also enuf la swt, got tips summore, easy peasy. BUT IN UNIMELB - YOU CAN JUST DIE IF U DO LAST MINUTE! Only genius can use this technique. GRR. BIG LESSON : I AM NOT A GENIUS. :/


K but seriously, locking urself up in study mode is dangerous cuz u wont realised u're like secluding urself away from everything, and your mind will go BAZONKERS -- i became a pessimist, out of fear and stress. And somehow, my connection with the outside world got cut out, and loneliness will seep in. (Cuz everyone, including me, is too busy to even hang out. Melbourne has became a Ghost town during the exam mth yucks!) And so, yea it's like the cheerful me became someone else. Became pessimist. and cuz of the lack of social gratification, i had the worst feeling of loneliness. I felt that my friends dont care for me. and i felt the worst feeling of homesickness too. plus i feel detached from my surroundings cuz im in a new place, where all my emotional supports are back home. that's an additional stress. it's like WALAO EH everything come in at once like tsunami ZZ. banjired my soul, left me drowned in emoness HAHAH! Just being drama LOL.


Conclusion : Being locked up in a stressful mode will alter ur thinking and turn you into an emotional shit hole that you drown yourself in emoness and depression and anxiousness and fear. That's the ultimate stairway to being a psychopath :s 


( HAHA i just realised i'm like doing the Modigliani & Miller proposition in Finance bahahhhhh! for the record, i hate finance :s if u even knw what i'm saying...?)


Well, not bad of a journey i must say.. what a freaking horrrifying detour from the peace and serenity of the healthy mind! :D And defo no more last minute and procrastination for me! :D


BAFOOOODLES! I'm off to dwell myself in my new found freedom and indulge in some shopping frenzy tmr. xo.

The Stress Rant! :S

Haix. I'm freakin sick and exams are near! HOW?!?! T__T :S :'( haix.. i dun even knw if i'm sickk. or gettting sick. am i really sick? im always so tired, and i have no appetite now. and last night my hands were all trembly and i cant sleeep. am i sick? :S 


i guesss it's all the emotional stressssss laaaaaaaaa. booohoooo. i think im stressing myself out too much. am i? but without the stress.. doesnt come the motivation and results! T_T no pain no gain! 


am i overstressing myself? freakin MelbUni weih.. idk how's the exams gonna be like...SIEN. :/ keeep spoookin myself imagining myself staring blankly at the paper with no freakin idea how to do.. telling myself my lecturers are evil.. and i keeep telling myself the exams are gonna be Freakin Sibeh ROFLMAO de HARD!!!!!! shiats. STRESS MOU?! T_______T yes stressssss. Can i blog my stress away.. HAIX. T_T


on top of dat.. i guesss i am undergoing emotional stress also la. honestly, this is the first time i really feel the real ganjiong-level of LONELINESS. as in not the type of loneliness where no one is there to accompany you la.. i have frens here. but the LONELINESS syndrome i contracted.. it's the type where, u dont have anyone close enough who knows you to the core who can listen to all your freakin emotional and stupid rants and give u a hug. :( i misssss all my best friends. :( there's no freakin anyone who knows me for who i am in Melbourne. Emo. :'( alll my stomach cacing (Quote Alex) is in Msia or somewhere else in the big big world. :/ Those besties that i cant live without is all elsewhere. And when i nid someone to talk to.. it's always freakin WhatsApp. Mayb i shud look into what's the closest alternative of getting a long, warm hug thru WhatsApp. Is there a way to make a text HUG feeeel real and warm. Maybe there is? ARGHHHHH. i jz need a hug to telll me that i'm gonna get thru this. I need that assurance. But then, such a simple thing, and yet, haix, cant get it. I HUG MYSELF LA WTF. DENGGGGGG~


mayb it's time to get a bf. Hmmmmm. let me google the best and fastest ways to get a bf PRONTO! 


"If you are desperate (I don't mean any disrespect when I use that word), then put yourself in situations that enable you to meet new people. Join a class/club etc, without your normal group of friends" 


OMG CHAN WEI QI U DESPO MEH!?!?! *slaps myself to wake up* dont be stupid to get a bf jz cuz u nid a hug!! zzzz im going cuckoo d SIEN :S *reminding myself : Only Serious Relationships! rmb? preferably with someone who knows u well!!" yes dat's my rel motto haha. dont laugh @_@ i'm just at my weakest moment, and how awesome would it be if there's someone special to help me get thru this? but at the moment, i decided to be strong and go thru this myself. VICKY U CAN DO IT! IT'S ALL IN THE MIND!! BE STRONG!! 


YES I CAN DO IT. I GOT THE OMPH NOW. I AM GONNA STRIVE FOR WHAT I WANNA ACHIEVE AND CHIONG AH! YES VICKY U CAN DO IT! U'LL BE AMAZED AT WHAT U CAN ACHIEVE! FOCUS AND FACE PROBLEMS INSTEAD OF COMPLAIN AND BAILING! YOU'LL MAKE IT! the mind is the strongest tool i have for now. i'm off to study now. wish me luck! :) 


My motivation for now :



*nothing can compare to deserving your dreams. It's amazing all that you can do.........."
DONT TAKE NO AS AN ANSWER! VICKY YOU CAN DO IT!

Falling for someone else while you're in a relationship..

Ever fell in love with someone else while you're still in a relationship? HAHA then this song is the ultimate guide for u to clean ur mess. :) 

For starters, here are the lyrics :
[Chorus]
Call your girlfriend 
It's time you had the talk 
Give your reasons 
Say it's not her fault 
But you just met somebody new 

Tell her not to get upset, second-guessing everything you said and done 
And then when she gets upset tell her how you never mean to hurt no one 
Then you tell her that the only way her heart will mend is when she learns to love again 
And it won't make sense right now but you're still her friend 
And then you let her down easy 

[chorus]
Don't you tell her how I give you something that you never even knew you missed 
Don't you even try and explain how it's so different when we kiss 
You tell her that the only way her heart will mend is when she learns to love again 
And it won't make sense right now but you're still her friend 
And then you let her down easy
 
[chorus]
And now, it's gon be me and you 




I rmb i used to not believe in falling in love with someone else while having someone already.. i used to think that if that happened, it just means that u're a fickle-minded jerk. It just means that u didnt love ur bf/gf in the first place. Haha i guess i was very rigid back then, sticking solid to what i think is right. 


Well bt as life goes on further, after experiencing stuffs myself, and as welll as listening to numerous stories, situations and opinions.. i came to find that nothing is ever 100% certain, and situations like that, CAN HAPPEN. not just to other people, bt maybe to myself too. Just like life, life is so uncertain and u wont knw what would happen next.. love is like that too i guess. That's why, the biggest mistake to ever make in life.. is to take everything for granted. 


What if one day you met someone who just swept you off your feet? What if u fell in love with someone else unintentionally? Wellll... to sum it up.. WHAT IF IT JUST HAPPENED? and neither u or anyone else couldve saw it coming or somehow control it. Who knows what would happen? it's LIFE! and one thing i learnt is to keep an open mind abt everything. Nowadays, i no longer dwell in my own perspectives.. i no longer think that i am always right. By keeping an open mind, i felt i am more susceptible to changes in life, especially those unexpected ones. It doesnt mean i dont give an eff abt everything or i didnt care or im very "shui bian".. It's just the way you look at things i guess? rmb there's always multiple angles to look at every single situation.. and i chose the most positive one.  Learn from the past, and take it as a token to lead a better life! :) The angle which ur mind works at is capable to change ur whole life. EVERYTHING LIES IN THE MIND. That is my life motto for every single thing i do.


Well, back to the topic! 


THE ULTIMATE QUESTION : What would you do if you were in this situation?
There are just too many things to ponder on! 
- First of all, i guess u have to figure out if the feelings you harbour for the other person is really love or mere infatuation? If u ever loved someone, u shud be able to tell the difference.
- If you fell in love with someone else, does it mean u dont love ur current bf/gf anymore?
- Are you still with your bf/gf out of obligation/commitment/habit?
- Etc etc etc.


And then.. i guess it comes down to whether u wanna use ur brain or heart :
Do you have the guts to live dangerously and go for what ur heart longs for? or
You're gonna do the right thing and try not to hurt anyone.
To sum it up.. It's whether u wanna be true to yourself or not. Live for urself, or live for others. 


Either way, it's a life choice. May or may not be life-changing, bt one thing is definite - Neither of it is right nor wrong. Everyone has ups and downs in life. Your up may be someone's down, vice versa. it's just part and parcel of life, no one lives a perfect life. And yea, cuz life is too interesting to ever be defined.


Well well well, life huh..? she's a bitch. HAHAH! that's why i nida be a bigger bitch LOL. just joking!


One ironic thing is when we use the word FOREVER. How are we ever certain enough to use that word?


Well i guesssss in conclusion, do not take everything for granted, especially ur loved ones. Cherish and appreciate whatever you have right now, and live in the moment. So even when it comes to an end, you wont regret.